Okay I lied. I’m not so good at being on my own. I never went on that self date and I’m afraid it’s not as easy as it was the first few days.
I feel incredibly lonely. I work by myself during the day and go home to an empty house at night. It’s a terrible feeling, too much solitude. I’m craving true human interaction.
It was nice having “me time” in the beginning. The quiet soothed me. I enjoyed the being with my own thoughts and surroundings. Now it haunts me. Lurks in the corner and demands to be heard. Or not heard, I suppose.
It consumes me. Every fiber. There’s no energy left for me to do anything else, but feel it. My hunger dissipates and my body feels weak. All I can do is sleep for now. Sleep will help. It always does.
I look forward to bedtime because that means I’m closer to tomorrow. Closer to a new day. Closer to Jesse coming home. It seems brighter.
So finish my dinner of string cheese and top it off with melatonin.
Tomorrow is brighter. Tomorrow I will be stronger.
Til next time,